Pads and Protectors

What the Code says about: Laundered Bedding

I have a confession.  My husband already knows this, but at the risk of completely going out on a ledge here...I kinda get, ok I really get hot at night.  In part, I suppose, because I sleep next to a handsome human being who produces enough heat to melt an igloo.  This inferno is further stoked by my subconscious stubbornees that will not submit to the temperature rise.  So even as I begin to heat up, I continue to tightly hold the medium weight down comforter snuggly under my neck.

I do not casually kick a leg out like most problem solvers do.  I choose to sweat.  I rationalize this insanity by categorizing my pm perspirations as "exercise."  I mean, I AM ridding my body of toxins.  What's the difference between forcing a night sweat and a solo saunsa session at the Glen Ivy?
Ok, fine.  You dont have to wash the sheets OR mattress mad if you're sweating it out at Glen Ivy.

Me on Tumble Dry.

So, semi-disgusted, I proceed to search for the tag on my mattress pad as if it were the Holy Graile  Turns out, it says you can wash it in WARM WATER, NON CHLORINE BLEACH, and
TUMBLY DRY.  Hmmpppfff, who knew?

I stuffed that bad boy into the washer, wondering why it was I had decided to get the extra plush model.  Still sopping and hardly "spun" (as promised on the washer) I opted to hang dry the awkward lumpy mass over my balcony (after I scrubbed it with a wet cloth).  Classy, I know.  And yes, the thought DID cross my mind.... should I invest in clothes pins?

After all, there's nothing like a clean white sheet (or mattress pad) blowing in the wind, soaking up fresh sunshine.  But in my case, it was 1am and it was dark, so that was as close as it was going to get to freshness.

But in the morning, alas, I had a freshly-clean mattress pad!  But I couldn't help but wonder (thank you, Carrie Bradshaw)....Do other full time working wives faithfully wash their mattress protector/pad?
If not, would anyone admit to it? Doubtful.

So I googled "How often should I wash my mattress pad and pillow protector?"

Google re-assured me, the loyal search engine that it is, that I am not the only person out there whose internal compass fails to point due domestic.